Upset Night

I'm trying really hard not to cry over you, because every tear is just one more reminder that I don't know how to let you go.

Because of him, i cant sleep tonight.. and, now my gastric pain knocking on the door.

I love him. I have ever reason to Love him. I have never love someone so deep that i could stay in the waiting game for half a year. But, i dont wanna to wait any longer cause i dont wanna be alone. Everyday people just like to ask me or sure there will be soneone to ask me "do you have a Bf?" So what you expect my answer Yes?? If so than dont ask me cause its a NO.. Why? - Cause i still waiting for him. I dont want to just be envy of my sister and my friends when they have a partner to share everything with them i want to be envy and someone to care for.. He wont understand my feeling. You been hurt before so am i but i really tried hard over the months to prove that i will change for the better, i wont interfer in your work, i will do whatever it takes to be a good gf & crew..

But seems like things is not working.out.. Sad but i just gotta feel this way..

Anyway, shall check my Rostering for October than head for bed.. Meeting Belinda love for town later gotta fix my nails and do a little shopping..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DIANA.. Its great to know and Thank you.for guiding me during flights..

Missing Him

Reported sick this morning, cause having Gastric pain.. Have to go all the way to Raffles clinic, so ask Belinda accompany me.. Love the doctor damn Gay Nice, friendly & approachable. 2days MC..

After, Dinner at bedok point.. When gastric attack i gotta stop my daily activity till it recovery means No Tom Yum, No Alcohol..

I guess my mood affected my Gastric. I can't get too upset, which i am this few weeks. About Work, I been grounded till my face recover. Blackberry, Now it at the hands of the provider for hardware installation for 2weeks i have to go without phone. They told me all data will be lost including contacts, BBm contacts, paid apps. About Him, Its been half a year after break up i still Miss him thought everytime i still meet him. I regret the breakup thats make me blame myself for it. Everytime when i thought hope is here i only end up hurt by his words. 我爱错了吗? He wanted me to be a Crew want me not to disappoint him, I did everything he ask of me but i never got what i ask of him.

我想要他好好的爱我。关心我, 给我幸福的感觉 sent me for or fetch me from flight, eat together. If you really felt between us theres No hope or Chance than let me move on. I miss Him, everytime when i got flight i wake up first thing i will look at my phone hoping to see his text hoping he will be awake to send me to the airport or after flight to switch on the phone hoping to recieve his text that his waiting for me at the airport, but i know I won't get to see both.

After So LoNG

Finally, I decide to write back my Life.. But this time a totally New life up at 35 000feet..
If not Him, I guess I won't be able to fulfill my dream, know new friends... If allowed i will write more about Daily life, since now being grounded due to my Peeling Face its boring back to office work..